Maybe Today
Posted by Linda Darlene Gibson April 4th, 2017 2,673 Views 0 Comments
“I wait for the Lord, my whole being waits, and in his word I put my hope. I wait for the Lord more than watchmen wait for the morning, more than watchmen wait for the morning. Israel, put your hope in the Lord, for with the Lord is unfailing love and with him is full redemption. He himself will redeem Israel from all their sins.” Psalm 130: 5-8
As I get up each day, the thought immediately comes to my mind… “maybe today”. Maybe today, he will move the mountain. Then I begin to pray for God to give me his strength to do what he will have me to do. God has placed me where I am today and today I still do not understand. I had struggled so many years with fear and sadness and God took me on a journey that delivered me from it. Through the journey he taught me so much and for this I am forever grateful. There came a day where I felt all my life came full circle and he redeemed me and brought me to a place where everything seemed so right.
Today I am reminded of the trials he allowed me to go through to learn to trust him, I struggled to the point I truly did not believe I could make it. Today is different, what I learned during that journey is he redeemed me for all the mistakes I had made. I was without a job for two and half years as I struggled to return to school and financially went from a two income family to a one. After I graduated with my Bachelor’s degree, I still waited six more months before he placed me in a job with people that I absolutely loved. In my mind, I had passed the test. I was finding my reward.
Only after a year at this great job, my world as I knew it crumbled. My husband’s job was requiring him to be transferred to another state. I was heartbroken but we had prayed for God to guide us to what he will have us do and this is what he wanted. We knew it without a shadow of a doubt. I gave notice to the job I loved, packed up our home and as I left my children and grandchildren, the tears streamed down my face and continued every day for two months. I have to admit I still give way to tears but he is my strength. I had lived in that little town all my life. My entire family surrounded me in my little part of the world there.
God spoke loud and clear to me to where he was going to place me in another job that I knew all too well from my past. I begged him to not put me back in Housing, I went to interview after interview for other jobs, yet the doors closed. Housing ripped my soul apart before and it's no different today. I see the families struggle. I witness young individuals make mistakes that will cause me to have to remove them from their homes. I hear their stories of broken hearts. Today, I will pray for them. Today, I feel in my heart I am doing God’s work though I still struggle daily to understand. I am blessed I have a job in this new place called home though it is away from all I have ever known. Today I realize the journey God allowed me to go through before was a building ground for this trial I am in now, before I struggled whether I would make it. Today I know I will make it.
Today, I will wait as the Psalmist wrote so many years ago, “I will wait for the Lord, my whole being waits, and in his word I put my hope. I wait for the Lord more than watchmen wait for the morning…”. Today, I have hope that tomorrow will be better because I have experienced it and today, I have hope that he has a better plan for me because he shown me. Today, I just hope!