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For you don't delight in sacrifice, or else I would give it. You have no pleasure in burnt offering. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit. O God, you will not despise a broken and contrite heart. Psalms 51:16 WEB

When I first came to the Lord, I was so ecstatic that I wanted to make up for everything that I had ever done wrong in the past. I enrolled in Bible college and like many others there, I developed a very legalistic view. I fasted for weeks, gave all that I had, tried to memorize the Bible, prayed all day, and listened to the Bible all night. I wanted to earn my salvation and prove that my dedication to the Lord was stronger than everyone elses. It soon became a repetition competition, where we just repeated the things that we had heard someone else say.

Oh I knew a lot about Jesus, I just did not know Him.I talked a lot about Jesus, but I never really talked to Him. I sang a lot about Jesus, but I did not sing to Him. Jesus said that there would be those who called Him, "Lord, Lord" and He would say, 'I never knew you.' That was me in a nutshell.

The Lord eventually broke me down to nothing, stripped away everything that I had, and separated me from everyone that I knew. It turned out to be the best thing that could have happened. I decided that I must have disappointed Him somehow. I must have taken too many wrong turns in life and He gave up on me. I had many excuses as to why He did not use me in ministry, but the whole time, He was preparing me.

Finally I dropped my 'Church Face' and started to just be 'Dion.' I began to involve God in my everyday life and talked with Him like a friend. I learned to relax, and to include Him in whatever decision I had to make. Only then did a relationship begin to develop between us, and that became life changing. Like the tiny mustard seed, faith will grow.

Attending church, fasting, praying, giving, reading the Bible, singing, is all good in moderation, but do not neglect Him while doing it. Believe me, you can, because I have done it. I encourage you to make Jesus a part of your normal life each day. Be a real person, serving God the best you can. When you stumble, repent and get back up. Be honest with Him, for He already knows who you really are.

Prayer: Father, I thank You for loving me. Help me be a better person, and make me stable. Lead me to where You want me and open the door that You want me to go through. Come into my life and be a part of it today, in the name of Jesus Christ I pray.